"Jobsworth"

The man's a total cretin
Complete imbecile
If ever he's on Death Row
Hope he half-chokes on his last meal.
I'd chop his fucking balls off
Serve them us as an In The Jungle dinner
And if he were a contestant
I'd make him eat the corpse of Michael Winner.
I hope you get your toes trapped
At the bottom of an escalator
And I'd chop your fucking cock off
So you'd still be a wanker but not a masturbator.
You'd never sleep at night
Cos I'd play you Big Ben on a loop
Then for breakfast I'd piss and shit in a bowl
And make you eat it for soup.
I'd brink back to life 'Mad' Frankie Frazer
Getting him to pull out your teeth
I'd tie you up naked hugging a tree
Deep into Hampstead Heath.
Sadly none of this will happen
They're just thoughts in my head
You'll go home oblivious tonight
Rather than maimed and dead.
In truth I just pity you
And the way you apply your role
When all I simply wanted to do
Was stand behind either goal.

Dulwich Poet 1st November 2017

(A steward at a Hungarian third division match didn't particularly enamour himself to me...this is for him!)