I can't believe the grief
For the death of a giraffe
What with everything else in the world
You're having a laugh.
Chopped up in front of children
And then fed to a lion
Would be better on pizza
New topping for Hawaiian.
Seriously...
What was the fuss?
Was it more gruesome to show
Than splatting all and sundry
On the computers they play?
Not to mention
Routine murders on the box
Then wanking over pornography
Watching out of proportion
Tits and cocks.
Yet you think
A gentle giraffe dissection
Will corrupt their mind
At worst they'll be bored
Or just go 'yuk!'
As they find.
Maybe that healthy giraffe
Didn't deserve it's fate
But if you're going to quote principles
Neither do creatures
On your Sunday plate.
Such concern is not for me
I'm not going to listen
To your plea.
So what if the Danes
Butchered a giraffe
Vikings know what they're doing
And know their stuff
You're not bovvered
By their bacon
So your moanings tough!
It could be you're one
Of that food fascist crowd
Wanting to dictate what we eat
By shouting out loud!
Well I'm more than happy
To munch any meat
Preferably the tasty stuff
That used to bleat.
I'm no culinary prude
I'll try anything first
Horse, kangeroo or dog
Try your worst!
My only gripe is
They never saved me a slab
As I wouldn't have minded necking
A giraffe flavoured kebab.
Dulwich Poet 12th February 2014
( A giraffe was put down in Copenhagen Zoo, as they were concerned about the genentics of corss-breeding with other giraffes. After being put down it was dissected in front of an audience that included some schoolchildre, and some of the meat was fed to lions at the same zoo. There was uproar from animal lovers around the world.)
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