That's your claim to fame, posh girl.
Go on, give us a twirl
Famous for the being the bum
That upstaged your sister's wedding.
Hope you enjoyed your
Strawberries and cream
Taking in your 'being ordinary'
Just one of us Wimbledon dream.
How you'd scream if you were ignored
Shame your lot aren't put to the sword.
Royalty-by-proxy is what you are
The Mail and Express made you a star.
A nobody famous by association
Made the darling of the nation.
If it were down to me I'd
Send you to France
Ending in a phoenix from the flames.
Concluding with a victory dance.
The same ending as
Your brother-in-law's mum
Splattered in a car crash
You quasi-Royal scum.
Dulwich Poet 10th July 2013
(This is about Pippa Middleton, sisster of Kate, the future Queen of England. She was quoted in the Metro free newspaper gossip column as having said of one of her visits to the Wimbledon Tennis Championships: "Treat me as a civilian" )
(I read this out at Walthamstow Library on Friday 16th August 2013)
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